Thu, Nov 08, 2001 03:02PM -0600

Currently tickling C.N. VIII: "Can't Cry These Tears Any More" by Garbage

It's too much effort. I'd much rather be drunk or stoned, sitting still in an avolitional haze, instead of pondering things, wondering about things, hoping, drawing up plans and schemes, following dreams. In many ways, it's a waste of time. Despite everything, I am not a complex man. I have very few wants, and between my right hand and a prescription pad, I can probably pretty much fulfill most of my desires. Maybe it's sad and pathetic, but as my oldest friend taught me, it's all about the simple pleasures in life.

But for a moment there, I had this impending sense of doom, that the world was closing in, that the space between sunrise and sunset was this imposssibly narrow claustrophobia-inducing corridor of light, palpable darkness on either side, that I would be alone forever, that hopelessness was the only cup I would drink from, that all I have are these Words, and nothing else.

But nothing is ever that serious. There is always room for laughter. Even on the brink of death. And if these Words are really all I have, I'm sure I can make do. My mood is lifting already.

As I said: no matter how far down you think you've fallen, you can always sink lower. So I haven't hit bottom yet. And sometimes I wonder what it could possibly be that is even holding me up. But it would be better not to wonder.

Today's Lecture

Professor: Actually, there is one more site that can be infected by gonorrhea. It's quite rare, but there is such a thing as gonococcal pharyngitis. I'm sure I don't need to tell you how you can get it.

Student: Well, how do you get it?

Professor: What, you want me to talk dirty to you?

And then there is Streptococcus agalactiae, which according to our esteemed professor is the etiology of "smelly vagina," and like Streptococcus pyogenes, it can also cause strep throat. And I'm sure I don't need to tell you how you can get it, either.

But looking back, I can't believe that I've been posting random crap on the net for a year now. I'd like to say something momentous to mark the occasion, but I can't think of anything. Although I am wondering if writing this ridiculous drek is keeping me from writing things of actual value. Oh well. Kilroy was here.