Non Possum Sperare
Drown My Sorrow
Moving On
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Drown My Sorrow

19971009-1729-08 19991129-0033-06
Half a bottle now empty, the rain is trickling, I can hear it
pattering on the windowpane.  I swear the wind wants to shatter it
open, crack it into a million pieces like my tormented heart.  I don't
even know where to begin, find a soft, still quiet place to rest, to
hide from this wracking wretchedness.  Oh how I wish I had never been
born, though it is useless to rail against Fate, the best I can do is
take another swig and hope for the best.  Oh, but to win, once, to
wear the laurel crown, stand the tallest on the pedestal, to have that
one sweet moment in time.
I've tried weeping, thinking that love (for lack of a better word) was
some kind of poison that I could just purge from my body.  Maybe I
could just vomit it out, that it would make things better, but all it
leaves me is empty like the discarded, crumpled beer cans I threw out
onto the street, now still against the asphalt darker than Night
Oh if I never gazed into your eyes, then perhaps my soul would not
have melted like soft tallow before the flames, I would not have to
douse myself with drink to keep from burning alive, to keep from
feeling, to stay numb, to be happy with no hope.
©1997,1999 by Victor Ganata